This American Kick in the Teeth

Thanks Ira Glass for that wonderful plea. Thanks for reaching out to podcast listeners with a private message just for us. Us “middle class people” who support the show. That’s nice. I’m sure no rich people ever contribute, and I’m sure no low-income families ever sacrifice a trip to the movies to support a good cause. Certainly not the way the “middle class people like you and me” do.

But of course, as we know, “a lot of people are freeloaders.” Must be the non-middle class listeners. And, by the way, it’s me. I’m a freeloader. I haven’t contributed to a dime to WBEZ. It’s a shame too—I’d like to be in the middle class. Too bad I get such pleasure from freeloading. Or wait—maybe there’s another reason I don’t contribute. Maybe I’m a student, eating a steady diet of pasta, rice, and PB&J so I can stay inside my monthly budget. Maybe when I had a job, back in Michigan, I did contribute to my local station, WFMU. Maybe I contributed more than the 30 cents, 5, or 10 dollars you asked for. Maybe I contributed 50 dollars. Maybe I donated similar amounts to The Red Cross, The ASPCA, and Doctors Without Borders. Maybe I did it with an income that put me in the bottom third of American households. Can you believe it? Is that even possible? Contributing with a non-middle class income? No, no. I must be lying. That’s a common trait among freeloaders.

And thanks too for offering to make it “worth [my] while” to donate, by promising me some “merch.” (And really nice job sounding “hip,” by the way.) Isn’t this about a radio show? A quality radio show? Isn’t what you’re giving away? Isn’t that what’s supposed to make it worth my while? Not pointless crap? I want stories about American life, not a poster. I want stories about American life, not a collection of stories about American…wait. So one of the “special” things you’re giving away is content from the show? I have that on my computer already, and it doesn’t require any extra plastic that will one day end up in the landfill, or any extra shipping material, which will also end up in the landfill.

We’re all used to annoying (though—and we all understand—necessary) pledge drives on public broadcasting networks. But that’s just it—we’re used to them being annoying. Not rude. Not insulting.

But maybe that was just a story in disguise. Maybe that was a story about this American life. A story about hawking wares. About promoting consumption, promoting class stereotypes. Maybe it was just meant to show us that even the things we think are better, that are above the daily nastiness, are just as mired as the rest of us.